My head is a little spinny today, and if I was on Facebook, I would set my [mood or status as “feeling a little stabby”. Of course, that is just a description, but each revelation about the state of our government just chips away at my serenity. My “new man is tempted to make some “arrangements” with my “old man”.


  • New man: Pssst hey!
  • Old man: “Tryina sleep ova here!”
  • Nm: “Pssst psssst hey, wake up! I need you to do a job for me”.
  • Om: “Alright already, sheesh! You sound like my old granny puutin’ Aqua-net Hair Spray on her beehive! Pssssssssst………..Psssssssssssst……………………pst
  • “What’s this jo…wait a minute  I thought I was persona non graten!”
  • Nm: “That was before”
  • Om: “Before what?”
  • Nm: “Before November 5th, 2020”.

No, but seriously, I am at a point where I’m kind of “over it”.  What I prayed for was for the Lord to bring out the truth. It didn’t occur to me that the truth could come out, all of it in minute detail, graphs and charts video and audio, and then the Biden bunch carry right on through with the charade, and the “conservatives” in congress would not only not even try to stop them, but would abandon our ship like the rats they apparently are, to join them. Better to have all their cards on the table, though I suppose. No more pretending.

The testimony of the CEO of Dominion had my b.s. meter spinning like it was on bath salts. The reports publicised today of the Forensic Audit on, Antrim Co, (I think?)  contradicted every single assertion he made. Under oath!

It would be funny if not so sad. Too little, too late, the Stop the Steal press conference expressed everything we hoped to hear…from the current Republicans in office. They vowed to primary every single one of the ones with an ‘R’ behind their name, who failed to stand with, and by Trump. That would be 98.97% of them. That’s what I mean. The termites have already devoured the foundation! It’s not just a few termites. State  Supreme Court judges, Governors, Attorney’s General, and the Supremes! Trumps own appointments are so scared of being accused of being partisan that they are willing to let socialism take this country slam down to the grave!

I can’t see 4 more years of Trump making any difference other than delaying the inevitable. I almost would prefer to get “the inevitable” over with.

The “progressives” don’t just want control. They want revenge! Because they are full of the devil.

You know, millions of Christians didn’t vote. There is a party that whose entire platform is wickedness, but they don’t vote. What is it they say about evil? It prevails when good men do nothing.

They lied to us about the “pandemic”. Faucci said one week, masks don’t help, 2 weeks later he says masks are absolutely essential. A month later, if it makes you feel better, wear it, but it’s not really doing anything. While the “experts” say one thing about how overwhelmed the hospitals became, boots-on-ground Doctors and Nurses told the truth. Nothing to do. They’re laying us off. That, folks is not poor communication. It is intentional. There is a name for it. It is called “gas-lighting”. It is purposeful confusion of message, purposeful contradiction, calibrated to cause you to question your own mind and perceptions. It is classic behavior of narcissistic psychopaths. But it is all a puppet show. Remember the olympic ceremony a few years back, characters meant to be nurses and patients, dancing around and shuffling beds all around, kids in them, all wearing masks?

I’ve jumped around a bit, the nearly 12 years of running this blog. Focus wise. I warned readers. Planning interferes with my process. Random IS my process.  That doesn’t mean there wasn’t a plan. It was God who had the plan. I have just been along for the ride. The enemy does his best to try and get me discouraged, distracted, burnt out, suspicious, disappointed, angry. Guess how he does that! Through people! We know God can only use sinners, because that’s all any of us are. The old man. He’s still there. Hopefully subdued and shrinking. Still there until Our redemption is complete, in our new untouched by sin bodies.

If we ‘re honest, we all have to admit that that old man still makes an attempt from time to time, for dominance and he does have his successes from time to time as well.

Everybody knows they cheated. Everybody knows they lie. Not only do they lie, but don’t even have a nodding acquaintance with the truth.

They have convinced some people that they care. About the poor, the oppressed, all the while everything they do keeps them poor and oppressed. They make a huge racket when you curtail access to abortion. Call you being racist. Those babies are sacrificed to their god.



Did you hear that the overall average number of deaths in 2020, is essentially unchanged for 2020. Not MORE deaths because of Covid. Just more dying folk who maybe had a positive Covid test. Heart attack deaths, stroke deaths, drownings, fatal accidents all apparently dropped by the exact same total number, as the number of Covid deaths. A lot like the way Biden votes increased by identical numbers that magically disappeared from Trump’s tally.

Suicides are up. Yeah, it is a statistical fact that when a nation is fraught with apostasy, suicides and murders, and other crimes increase.

Men die by suicide at 3.5 times the rate of women.It’s not that women don’t try. They generally select less lethal means. Men just succeed more. Hang themselves, shoot themselves. Suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death for ages 15-34. Suicide propensity is 1.5 times higher in military veterans than others in their same age group.

America was decadent in the  “roaring 20’s”, sodomy was rampant. Then the Dust Bowl years, and the Great Depression. Wars got us out of the depression, but broke a lot of spirits, and the people remembered God, there were revivals in the 50’s. Then the sixties came. When did God send famine to the Jews? When they followed after other gods, practicing what God forbade, next thing you know, crops are failing, and outside enemies gained the upper hand. And they had no power to stop anything that enemy had in mind. Sound at all like where we’re sitting today?

Will there be a continuation of this predictable cycle? God gave us a 4 year reprieve, but even Trump made some really bad decisions. He got this M33 messenger-based vaccine made, and I believe some Americans are already getting them, starting today. This vaccine is not the mark of the beast, but it is absolutely the precursor, and Covid or the next engineered bioweapon, will be the pretext.

Trump (via Jared Kushner) got the Middle East peace started. But as usual, Israel had to agree to giving up some land. Oh it wasn’t presented as such to the world in general, but it was part of the bargain on Israel’s part.

Even if Trump managed to stay in, it seems likely he won’t serve the entire 4. There have been many attempts to “dispose” of him already but until God is finished with His plan for Trump, he was/ is going to be effectively bullet-proof.

Nobody has to tell any of us that darkness is falling. Nobody should have to tell believers that until the Lord removes us, we will be seeing increasingly more things that the world has never seen before, and personally may witness and even be party to tragedies. But I can personally testify (and so can many, many others) to those of you who haven’t experienced any really terrible or frightening thing yet, you will not be terrified, traumatized, overwhelmed or consumed. Instead, you will be in awe, so enthralled by the peace God wraps you in, that you will look back even after living it, and you’ll marvel at it and wonder why you weren’t scared out of your mind. You will experience that if your faith is in Him, and if you are born-again, it is. Realizing you are entering into something which you literally have zero power to stop or alter, is very liberating.

It is only when you have absolutely no option but to trust that HE is enough, that you will learn that He is. You can take it to the bank!





The truth is getting out despite the massive effort to prevent it

Under Obama, many, many doctors stopped private practice and shifted to being employees of the hospitals. That allowed them to work their hours and go home and have a life outside of work. Doctors have had their ability to practice curtailed more and more for decades anyway. The HMO’s, government, insurers, have tied their hands. The doctors have to pay off their student loans, they have to pay for their malpractice insurance, many doctors with integrity can’t in good conscience treat patients according to parameters dictated not by science but financial incentive in a system that views patients purely in terms of profit and loss,  and have left medicine altogether. Nurses, any healthcare worker with a conscience are resigning over this. That’s not good for the millions who need care for their very real medical needs. The evil of this boggles the mind!

Attorney Thomas Renz Drops BOMBS! Hospital Administrators Killing For Cash, Threatening Docs



In California, Hundreds of Men Transfer to Female Prisons

To ignore biological reality in the context of punishment and rehabilitation is not wholly different than a doctor or nurse treating a patient according to a perceived identity that conflicts with biological reality. Such medical care would not be helpful or loving. It would be malpractice.

Source: In California, Hundreds of Men Transfer to Female Prisons

Angel in the Pre-op

It’s been a long time since I started this blog. Here is a piece I wrote about one if the times God moved on my behalf in avery memorable way just to let me know He loves me, I guess!

——-<°((>< [)—{ ♡ }—(] ><))°>——-

Angel in the pre-op

While I am writing in the genre of interesting true storeies, another one comes to mind. In December of ’09 I needed surgery on my back. It was during another one of the times when my several medical conditions seemed to all decide to exacerbate at once, and I fell and ruptured a disk. The orthopedic neurosurgeon who was to do my surgery, was highly recommended and very organized and thorough in all aspects of the surgery, from pre-op assessment, to follow-up after. So on the week of sugery, he has the patient come in for their pre0-op work-up, and a class with an RN, to educate the patients on just what they can expect, what to do and not do after suregery, and especially what to call him about in the days immediatly after. As a mom who isn’t done raising her kids, I was very concerned about the risks of the surgery, as it would be the first anesthesia I’d had since the narcolepsy was diagnosed, and besides that, it was my spine! The whole pre-op session was a couple of hours long, and there were only 2 other peope in the class who would be having surgery by this same doctor. The older fellow introduced himself as Dr. Benjamin McDaniel, and he told us that he would be going to a local nursing home for several weeks after his surgery because he had no one to help him at home. He was quite personable. Everything about going to doctors is very anxiety-laden for me, since I have had years worth of bad experiences in pursuing diagnosis. After the class, I went back to the pre-op testing waiting area, waiting for my turn with the nurses and doctor. And Dr. Benjamin soon came in and sat down, and struck up a conversation with me. He told me that I reminded him of his now-deceased daughter-in-law, whose name happened to be the same as mine. He told me that his son and she had 2 teenage boys when she died, and that as their Grandfather, he had concerns for how they’d all fare after her death, because he felt that had his own wife died and left him with 2 teens, he wouldn’t have known how in the world to raise them right on his own. But he went on to say, my son is a busy lawyer, but do you know, he made those kids a priority, and they thrived, and today one has his Masters and the other is working on his Bachelors degree. Dr. McDaniel talked about his wife and how much he loved her and depended on her strength, and that she was his world, but that he had survived it when she too passed away a couplel of years back, and he’d realized life does, indeed go on. He knew the pediatrician who had cared for our first son (also named Benjamin) when he was born. He also told me that our doctor had scheduled his surgery for the same day as mine, and that he had chatted with him in the doctor’s lounge only that morning. When the nurse called my name, and I got ready to get up, I realized that he had held my hand the whole time we were talking.

A week later, at my follow-up appointment, I asked our doctor how Dr. McDaniel’s surgery had gone. The surgeon said “Who?” I said, “Dr. McDaniel, you did his surgery the same day as mine. He went to the nursing home afterward, he chatted with you in the doctors lounge a couple of days before…… The surgeon’s response: “Never heard of him”.

Now, I was at one time an outpatient surgical RN. I know this for certain: a doctor does not do surgery on another doctor and not remember every single aspect of that doctor’s case. I left scratching my head that day, and wondering if maybe, just maybe, I had entertained “angels unaware”. In fact there had been several other aspects of that pre-op test morning that were striking. First off, I love to hear a bell choir. When I had walked into the cavernous lobby of the hospital that December morning, I was greeted by the beautiful sound of Christmas carols played on the bells. Also, when I had asked about seeing the anesthesiologist to discuss my fears about anesthesia with narcolepsy, the nurses had looked at the name and got dubious expressions, and one said, we will page and see if we can get him up here, but sometimes they are just too tied up to come. But the doctor had come right away, and had pulled up a chair like he had all the time in the world. When I told him I was worried about the anesthesia risks with Narcolepsy, he told me that he does it all the time, and he addressed my every concern, and even said, “Is there anything else I can do for you?” When I said no, he shook my hand, patted me on the shoulder, looked me in the eye and said “don’t worry about a thing, you are in good hands”, then he left. When I looked at the nurses, they were both standing there with their mouthes hanging open, and one said “I don’t know who you are, but we have NEVER been able to get that doctor to come up here to talk with a patient!” And then later, when there was some missing records that were still needed for my pre-op file and had not been obtained, despite several calls on my part, I happened to know where my doctor’s nurse had gone after my class, (she was giving an in service on some new equipment” so I went in search of her, and not only did she jump on the phone and make a few stern calls on my behalf, she also gave me her personal number and told me to call her again if I had questions and needed anything.

And on the day of the surgery, after all that, I was totally at peace, and get this: Usually I am an easy stick, but 6 nurses could not get my IV started, so the Nurse Anesthetist came in to do it. She sent everyone else out of the cubicle and she spoke to me in low tones and said “I have never met another nurse who has narcolepsy. I have it too, but I don’t tell anyone around here for fear they might think I can’t do my job”. I can’t think of anyone I would want handling my anesthesia than another human being who has lived narcolepsy and would recognize right away if something narcolepsy-related was going on!

Isn’t God amazing?

Personal update

Posting has gotten pretty spotty, as you have probably noticed. Mom was finally discharged home from rehab on the 11th, but she is far from the independance we had hoped her surgery would restore. I learned at her last primary Nurse Practitioners appointment just prior to surgery in November last year that she had changes on her head CT, so the memory issues she already was having were more than the absentmindedness that always worsens with new stress for her. The lack of oxygen that occured during surgery definitely took another chunk out of her mental capacity. She knows everybody, where she lives, can keep up with date and time on the clock, but whether she paid her homeowners insurance, or what her e-mail password is, when her next appointment is, those kind of things are gone. She was still capable of driving before surgery, now,she might be able by muscle memory, but could she find her way home? At least she is cognizant enough to know she shouldn’t drive. Memory stuff can be very puzzling.

She is mobile with a walker, but has Menieres vertigo, and possibly other dizziness from some of the necessary meds. Her kidneys are functioning again, with the aid of 2 diuretics, so she has not had dialysis in 2 weeks. She has fallen about 7 times in the past 3 weeks, 3 since coming home, and the last time was 3 nights ago. Her bones must be pretty strong, no breaks, but a sore coxxyx. Her skin is so fragile that the epidermis peels back like the skin of a plum, and she shredded it in 3 large areas on her right arm that night, trying to break her fall against the corner of her dresser. She had been getting to the bathroom with her walker independantly several nights, and she said she doesn’t know what happened, but she must have bumped the corner of her dresser as she rounded to go through the bathroom doorway and spun around as she fell. When I came in, she was turned the opposite direction of the bathroom to which she was headed, sitting on the floor bleeding. My nephew had gotten to her quickly, and by God’s grace, I was far enough into the half-life of my xyrem dose that he was able to wake me up and I was fairly functional to get her bandaged up til morning, when I soaked off the dressings, cleaned the wounds, and did a better dressing.

Unfortunately, since she didn’t want to return to the same NP who had ignored her concerns about the pain in her legs for years, (caused by the bilateral femoral artery blockages she finally had the surgery for) that NP wouldn’t sign her home health orders, and so her home health PT and OT and nurse stopped coming after first visit, having no orders. I am concerned insurance will use that as an excuse not to pay for any home health now even if they can get orders from the new doc. Same NP neglected to refer her to a kidney specialist as well, when her kidney function had been diminishing for years. All tolled, it really is pretty miraculous that she has recovered as much as she has, physically. I attribute that directly to God and via her surgeon, her kidney specialist, and the nurses and therapists at the rehab facility. I had to stay on top of everything and speak to them about a number of issues, but management, staffing shortages, and administration where mostly responsible for the aspects of her rehab stay that were unnecessarily complicated, unduly stressful, frustrating and confusing. For the most part, those who worked with her directly were compassionate, caring and competent, and many were Christians.The one individual who really strived to help me (as her medical power of attorney and daughter) was one social worker who was her assigned “guardian angel” for that role. I took complaints and concerns directly to the on-site CEO, so as not to take floor staff away from patient care, but no matter how you parse it, medical care has become extremely disjointed. Continuity of care, and holistic care used to be the key concerns of administering patient care. Not anymore! The nurses in the facility generally knew nothing about her renal status when asked, other than the fact she was getting dialysis. I had to call the diialysus facility if I wanted to know her latest creatinine level. The nurses at rehab, couldn’t even access the therapy notes! I was gobsmacked.

I realized doctors had taken to a pattern of treating merely the ” slice” of the patient they specialized in, heedless of the whole, but didn’t realize how tragically nursing had gone the same route. What the heck happened since I went to nursing school in the 90’s? And even just since I left nursing a decade ago?

The “system” has been breaking down for a long time, I guess. There was a nursing shortage when I went in, and it eased some in the 2000-2015 years but there is a much worse one post-covid. I tried to view the shortcomings through the lense of the aftermath of covid, and to just be very thankful our healthcare system is still holding together. But I wasn’t going to tolerate her being neglected, either. So I kinda became “that daughter”. The number of calls, emails, appeals to insurance, ombudsperson, and third parties, oye! 4 months in hospital is a looooong time.

Anyway, the current situation is not sustainable as is. She has a grandson in his early 30s with some special needs whom she raised, who I believe is capable of independance, and even of caring for her but needs some services and support to get where he can do so. He can’t manage her right now on his own,his sister came ho mb e to cover the next two weeks, but after that, it’s back to me, so we may have to bring her to VA where my brothers can help me with her. That leaves the grandson alone up there in WV, which I fear isolation may set him back. I’m leaving out a lot of detail, of course, but many of you out there have some similar scenario either in your own family or know of someone else who does. My goodness, that term ” sandwich generation” has been around a while now. She was still raising grandkids when her mom started needing care. Now she needs a lot herself and the grandkids she raised and her kids are all helping as best we can, but all except the special needs one, live in other states.

All I can say is God better have something up His sleeve, because I sure haven’t figured out a plan. I’ve felt this day coming and hanging over me for years. My brothers and I tried years ago to head off some of these potential issues, but for reasons beyond our comprehension, our parents wouldn’t consider our proposals, nor these eventualities and they just weren’t willing to take measures, and now here we are.

The world changed so much during their lifetime, and my parents were simple folks from the hills of WV, so they managed, especially Mom, to not have to face some of the harsher realities of life in this age. If I had a dollar for every time she has had a new rude awakening since Dad died, I might could buy a pair of half caret diamond studs.

She was a mom and housewife, raised six kids,(2 were her grandchildren, so basically a second family, one of which she’s still “responsible for” at a time when she can no longer care for herself). Now her adult birth kids need to take care of her. The 32 year old grandson (and 28 year old granddaughter) went to a tiny Christian school where not only were there no screenings for autism and such, but because he was different he was picked on and bullied, and considered a “problem” by some teachers, as was his sister. They both left their 12 years of that school with emotional scars. I personally am convinced he has aspergers, she is diagnosed schizophrenic.

When Dad died 10 years ago, Mom was still providing for both of them, and my neice had yet to be diagnosed. The things my Mom has been through just in the last decade would have broken most people.

Now surgery and rehab have taken her life savings as well.

My older brother had been set to spend a couple of weeks there with her next, but circumstances beyond his control have nixed that.

My younger brother and his wife have a family friend in elder care who has recommended a new-ish outfit near us who specialize in coordinating the care needs of the elderly, that I plan to look into after I rest up a day or two. I have to first find out the implications of insurance, whether bringing her to VA is at all an option, and he will make a place for her in his home, while hopefully this practice will coordinate the transfer of care. I will still have to handle all her medical stuff, but at least I wouldn’t be away from home for weeks at a time.

Meanwhile, our Army daughter-in-law is on standby in her logistics unit, to spend 6 weeks in NC to facilitate deployments to Poland in relation to Putin’s escapades, and thus our son needs our help with taking care of precious grandson!

Ok, Lord, we are looking forward to watching what You do! I am soooooo happy to be home! Hubby had the place all clean, and had picked some hyacinths and brought them in and put them in a vase, he had the blinds open, and I just loved all my color and comfort of home and hubby so much all over again! Weary but blessed! Our home is my sanctuary from the insanity of this world, and all the craziness life can throw at us.

Our youngest has finished two (USAF)deployments in the Middle East and just moved into his own off-base apartment in Lompoc, Cali, is starting Sgt training, and still working on his Mechatronics degree. Our oldest is busy being a great dad, working as an EMT, and after serving his 6 years and getting out of the army August of 2020, has gone back into the reserves. His wife is a wonderful mom and besides the army, she is working on her business degree.

Myself, I have lost 65 lbs in the past 2 years, gotten off of all but 3 meds, though I take several supplements, and at least until Mom’s surgery, I was doing better health-wise than I had in a long time. Even managed to do some selling online of my jewelry, until Mom’s discharge. That’s ok. There’s flexibility in that, and I can just build up my selling profile a little at a time.

My Mom complemented me on my patience while I was there last week. THAT is proof God is working. Nobody, EVER has commended me for patience before But, you know, in life, things we take for granted, get stripped away, and you either learn to accept the losses, or you rot from bitterness from the inside out. Patience gets to be part of that bargain.

When you can do, and you have energy and strength and can say “I don’t like to sit still, I love to stay busy” you can’t even imagine not being active.

Before narcolepsy, that was me. And sometimes it is hard to listen to someone who still has all that vitality. They often like to say things like, “don’t you think you’d feel better if you got out more?” You end up getting denigrated for what is a loss you already grieve. But there is a settledness about me too, a contentment I have, that super-busy people tend to notice, especially in our home.

I used to try and educate people around me. Now I don’t waste my energy. Either someday it will be them, and then they’ll “get it”, or they will never get it no matter how much effort you put into trying to make them understand.

My stuff is my stuff to deal with. I haven’t disengaged from what is going on in the world, but have less to contribute to that dialog at this juncture. I mean, what’s the life expectancy of a blog these days? So many that started when I did, are long gone.

One thing that my trips to WV for Mom have facilitated, has been time with my dear Aunt, Mom’s sister Jean. She is a Jehovah’s Witness. We have had a lot of conversations. I’m trusting the Lord that some truth breaks through. 30 years is a lot of investment on her part, but God can get through.
I have seen more of all my aging aunts and uncles. Those connections got lost when Grandma passed. Mom’s place has never been big enough for extended family to gather. Instead of us growing up and moving away, Mom and Dad moved back to WV when Dad retired, so the common denominators that bring families together on any regular basis, just haven’t been there. Like everything else, family ties just aren’t what they used to be. Fewer kids, fewer siblings bigger age gaps between cousins, and fewer cousins, period. Far flung addresses, fewer visits, even family we do have, we may not know well.

There are so many reasons I feel bad for younger generations. But they are a breed born for their time just like the rest of us, so I guess they’ll weather it. I am blessed and thankful that at the ages of 24 and 26, both our boys have expressed gratitude for the way we raised them. I think missionary Pastor Hester was right when he told me that “you don’t know but what your being sick all those years wasn’t the best raising those boys could have had. It taught them everything’s not all about them.” The same could be said for my husband’s work struggles. God knows who can do well with prosperity and who needs to struggle. He knows adversity can make a better man or woman than ease.
He is a wise God. He knows when to go easy and when to squeeze. He plans the seasons of our growth according to His design for each of us, and has His own vision of what He will accomplish. I am not my own project. I’m His. And you know something? How often do you hear that from a pulpit? Have you ever?

We get all wrapped up in our vision, our aspirations and goals. We may have spiritual ambitions, ideas what kind of Christian we would like to be. But the Bible says He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it. They say life is what happens to you while you are making other plans. That’s certainly true. Maybe sanctification is what happens to a believer when we are trying to be what we think He expects, only what He wants us to be is so far removed from what we think He expects, we don’t even realize what He has been doing until we start to get around middle age and above. In other words, God’s gonna do God, and if we are His, He’s not just occasionally intervening. We are each a continual work in progress. I’m not calling the shots. I know that better than some, because of things that have been stripped away, but there’s still plenty of carving, shaping, purifying, tempering….and when will that be completed? He doesn’t say. There are ages of ages yet to come. That’s why I tend to see this life as if it is practically only a second womb. Real life, for the follower of Jesus, hasn’t even started yet. But it’s always getting one day closer!

Exaggeration is not helpful

 There are a ton of websites where good prophecy-pertinant news and information can be gleaned, but some just can’t seem to stick to the facts as they are, without embellishment or exaggerationn.

I read a story this morning about an executive order put in place by  Gov. Bill Lee of Tennessee. The article claimed that the EO authorized national guard to “break into your home, kidnap you at gunpoint, and haul you off to internment camps.”

I read the EO. It authorizes National Guard to administer tthe Covid test. That’s all it authorizes them to do.

It authorizes retired medical personnel to be reactivated to practice without re-testing, allows EMT’s and others with medical training to work in hospital setting and authorizes nursing student graduates who have yet to take board exam to be utilized in medical setting. It makes similar provisions regarding medical lab workers and licensing if ambulance drivers. It waives the requirement for a specifically-Tennessee nursing license, as long as a nurse has a license from any other state. It makes provision for payment to facilities should they be temporarily designated for Covid-related use and it allows the ever- ongoing state Health Department inspections of medical facilities, and investigation of complaints against licensees, to be temporarily suspended in order to free up facility staff and those inspectors (who themselves are often licensed in the medical field), to also join the efforts against covid.

There is a provision regarding mental health services, but doesn’t pertain to patients, only to staffing, and impelenting telehealth, avoiding in-person contact when possible.

Are FEMA camps real? Yes, I  researched and read the government documentation surrounding that topic during Obama’s first two terms. But a lot if what was clamoured about back then, never happened. Just because some endeavors of our ” public servants”, (not leaders) have nefarious motives behind them, does not mean they will be carried out. Just because some people in government agencies have the morality of Josef Mengele, does not mean they will get by with his atrocities. The saying goes “evil prevails when good people do nothing, but from a scriptural standpoint, the the more accurate statement would be “evil only prevails when righteous people fail to be salt and light”.

I am all for being informed, obviously, but the enemies of conservatism, liberty, and faith are doing a fine enough job of keeping things murky without the conservative side muddying the waters even more.

Here is the EO. See for yourself.

Images: screenshot

Nobody is perfect, and there is so much going on, it really isn’t easy to keep up and to always vet everything to the nth degree, but this kind of thing erodes credibility.

At least that is probably just an honest mistake, and rooted in genuine concern.  The following two items, however, stem from arrogance in the guise of concern.

Bennett’s Rosh Hashanah threat: If people don’t get vaccinated, they won’t hear the shofar

Zuckerberg’s vision for the future of religion

It boggles the mind. God created the amazing minds of scientists, doctors, innovators, but they don’t even acknowledge his existance. Kind of like Gerry “The Penguin” Nadler when he said ” the will of God is of no concern to this congress”. That’s arrogance.

The cares of this world can’t dampen our anticipation of the trumpet call and shout! They profess to be wise, God calls them fools.  They think they are superior, God says the evildoers will be cut off and those who wait upon the Lord will inherit the earth. The globalists do not win. So don’t worry!

Important Information gleaned from the Rogan interview with Dr McCullough

I listened to that whole 3 hr Rogan interview and pulled out some highlights.

-Buy dilute Betadine over the counter at the pharmacy. Use 2 tsp in 6 oz of sterile water. (Never use tap water for nasal lavage). Using a bulb syringe, squirt up nose, and “snort” it to the back of nose and throat, then cough-spit it out, gargle the rest of it. Then follow this with regular antiseptic mouthwash like Listerine or Scope. This is called topical virosidal therapy. You want to do this after having been in closed spaces with others such as public transportation, a crowded store, conference room, or crowded public restroom. The spread of Covid is airborne. Dr. McCullough suggested doing this at the end of the day when you come home from being out, anything where you have spent more than 3 hours in close contact with others because 85% of the spread happens in the home. He sited a study in which 2 groups of 303 people were positive for Covid, and half of them applied this virosidal treatment each day for 3 days, while the control group did not. Of the virosidal regimen users, positives were reduced to only 24 out of the 303 by day 3. So his conclusion is that contagion control must focus on nose and mouth.

-Mask usage does not stop the virus itself from passing through a mask, but does limit the explosive velocity of droplets from a cough or sneeze, that can spread clear across a room without the mask. Haven’t you ever noticed in a class or conference, someone at one table sneezes, a few seconds later someone else sneezes? From one sensitive nose, right to another one across the room. Ew.

-No medical school in America has it’s own protocol for treating Covid. His conclusion: “The best and brightest” have no ideas of their own to offer on this crucial issue. (A sad and alarming commentary on the state of academia in America)

-Rogan asked why so many educated and bright people got it so wrong. Dr. M cited studies that indicate an actual “Mass Psychosis” under way, in which elements of fear are introduced and levels of anxiety are so elevated for so long, that people become willing to give up freedoms, marching in lockstep with the authoritarians.

The Bible in Revelation 18 gives a description of the fall of Babylon and vs 23 says “And the light of a candle shall shine no more in at all in thee; and the voice of the bridegroom and the bride shall be heard no more at all in thee; for thy merchants were the great men of the earth; for by their sorceries were all the nations deceived”. The Greek word for “sorceries” there is “pharmakeia”. which is a combination of substances as well as the standard understanding of sorceries which is “magik” or dark arts, or the occult and alchemy.

I find it interesting that the experts are looking at this as mass psychosis. The Bible tells us also that in these last days be careful not to be deceived (Matt 24:4) and yet there are so many occult practices that have even infiltrated the churches themselves, such as “spiritual formation”, labyrinths, contemplative prayer, “Christian”  yoga and “Christian destiny cards or Oracle cards” and Enneagram. We aren’t surprised as students of prophecy, that this mass psychosis has taken hold, but what I find interesting are the unbelievers who can see it for themselves. Maybe because they care about truth?

-Dr. M points out that here were Johns Hopkins planning documents about this plandemic that indicate the mass psychosis itselfwas planned. I am just highlighting points that stood out to me from the video which I posted earlier today, and adding my own commentary here. If you want to dig in further you will have to watch the 3 hour interview for yourself, and I really suggest doing so before it disappears off Rumble. The CDC and the WHO both have now officially declared there should be no testing of someone who is asymptomatic, because asymptomatic spread simply is not taking place. 97% of asymptomatic positive test results are found to be false positives, or dead circulating virus. People who get a second infection and think it is Covid, either are positive now, and had some other virus like the flu, before, or had Covid and have some other virus now. He basically said if you have had Covid you have lifelong immunity now.

-Another alarming statement he made is that no Hospital leader in the world has created any plan for preventing hospitalizations and deaths from Covid. They are all only focusing on vaccines. That is insane! Even people who have  had the vaccine are getting Covid and still ending up in the hospital and dying from it. The FDA and CDC are both actual financial stakeholders in the vaccine initiative, and using taxpayer money, while being immune to any risks.

The FDA and CDC are not supposed to be running clinical trials. That was never their role. He said in general with a drug trial, when there have been 5 deaths in a drug trial, a black box warning is issued. With 50 deaths, the drug would be taken off the market. With the vaccines, after a very eager 178 million were vaccinated, we might normally see 187 deaths, yet there was not even a safety review done when after 150,000 vaccines  we yielded 18,000 deaths within 48 hours, and that’s just the ones reported. 80% of deaths were within 2 weeks of getting the vaccine, while 30,000 more were permanently disabled. Most of the deaths were among seniors in their 70’s and 80’s.

Most of the VAERS reporting was done by nurses and doctors, and a few individual patients. The Centers for Medicare did it’s own count and showed 45,000 more than VAERS reports did during the same period.

So much discrepancy!

-Dr. M indicated that essentially the threat to seniors is about the same whether they got the shot or didn’t. Because the threat is the spike protein itself.

The data seems to indicate that myocarditis risk is higher at 80% in boys, as compared to 20% in girls, but that in young active people they may not differentiate between the soreness of myocarditis and overall soreness of their normal athletic activity level and the fact that any strenuous activity when myocarditis is present, can lead to sudden cardiac death, means the sudden deaths of soccer players in Europe, and football players, even though they probably came about from the vaccine, were still preventable, and many of those who died might have survived and recovered if education about the vaccine and myocarditis symptoms had been more thorough. The censorship itself has been the crisis, as much as the vaccines and Covid have. Both Covid, and the vaccines create the spike proteins. The issue here is, these young people were at a very low risk of getting covid to start with, and even if they got it, healthy young people survive it easily. So why the push for vaccines? That is the question people need to be asking themselves. Well, according to the Dr, the launch of a new drug is considered “successful” when the drug profits the drug company a billion dollars in the first  year. Pfizor hit $33 Bilion in the first year with their vaccine. That’s with the taxpayers footing the investment bill, and no advertisement or marketing costs to worry about. No liability for wrongful deaths.

Another very important takeaway from the interview, monoclonal antibodies as early treatment saves lives, and prevents hospitalization. Again, why are we not getting offered those? Merely because the CDC FAQ recommended that people stay home until they were having difficulty breathing, and the same FAQ relegated MABs to “early treatment”. So like a kid who only knows how to push the french fry button on the McDonald’s cash register, doctors literally just aren’t thinking for themselves. Dr. M pointed out that in general doctors are “nerds” intellectual types, not like NAVY seals or cops who are used to charging in and doing bold things, and most of them were just waiting for someone else to tell them what to do. Wow.

I”d say Covid has done for medicine what Covid also did for schools. It has shown us how too many of the people have given over autonomy and oversight and gone to sleep at the wheel. Parents realized the garbage that is being passed off as “education” when it is indoctrination and even grooming. In medicine, nurses have been more astute than doctors have, but doctors are waking up.

That’s good news, but as with education, is it too little and too late? I am speaking from the standpoint even of the lateness of the hour, we know prophecy  is being fulfilled, but we have to continue to contend with this old world as it is, not as we wish it was, until this dispensation ends. Dr. M indicates near the end of the interview that a sort of revolution is taking place in medicine. More and more doctors are raising more and more awareness. Disinformation mills like CNN are circling the drain.

That’s why we have to always keep fighting the fight. Like so much else, there are celebrity types out there on television, even doctors, even testifying before congress, who look the part, and may be well spoken, but most of them actually have never even treated a covid patient, yet they are spouting fake expertise. Like lifelong politicians who have never even worked any real job in the real world. Like the creepy whisperer in the oval office.

This is the world now. This is America now. But God is merciful, and His creation, both the planet, and our amazing human body, are much more resilient than we credit them to be. We don’t have to worry about evil men who are perpetrating this, as believers, we know God has known this all would come, and nothing is flying under His radar. Even the stuff that sticks in our craw. Those things can eat you up if you let it. Don’t. Be like the clam, it spins nacre around the irritant, and that’s what forms a pearl. God is up to something even with the irritants of life.

-Getting back to the vaccines, one last point that Dr. M brought out as far as important info that is being suppressed, it is the lipid nanoparticles of the vaccines that are preferentially taken up in certain organs, like the brain, and heart, ovaries, and adrenals, leading to neurological problems, heart problems, infertility, clotting, etc.

-Covid risk to kids is low. Covid vaccine risk to kids is very high. It makes no sense at all to be mandating these vaccines for kids. Don’t let the pressure wear you down. Keep resisting when it comes to your kids. Pray for those folks that are knowledgeable and who are trying to get the truth out there. Also pray for truth to prevail in media, in government, in the field of medicine, just in the world in general.

The world is in freefall, and there are still a lot of people who haven’t even realized it yet. We all have to be about truth. Truth is powerful. That’s why the enemy is so afraid of it. Tell people the truth about the vaccines, and who knows what other truth they might start being able to see? People are too afraid of truth. Don’t go to church and pretend you are fine when you aren’t. Refuse to play that game. It seems like if we just decided to do that, some of the general mass psychosis might begin to lose it’s grip. It’s got to start somewhere. No wonder the world is so easily deceived. We are the ones who God has given truth to, and yet we were living behind figurative masks long before the face diapers became a thing. Maybe we are just reaping what we have sown in that respect.

I don’t know, just some of my thoughts on this New Years Day as we face a year many of us never thought we would still be here to see. I won’t bother to wonder about how “bad it might get”. 2021 was not a bad year for me, relative to many other years, and even in difficulties there are always blessings to be counted.

So I say, lets just keep on going! Stick to the path. That’s life! Take it as it comes, right?





On trying to keep on keeping on

I have something going on neurologically that I don’t entirely understand. I will be discussing it with my doctor tomorrow at my physical. I would appreciate your prayers. I have experienced many strange things and the concerns I have now, most of them have happened before at one time or another, but now there is no question that something is affecting my central nervous system. I changed my primary doctor about 15 months ago because my then-current doctor just wasn’t doing me any good after 20+ years. He seemed not to have time to listen and got short with me if I brought up more than one concern when I came in.  I think he just has too many patients, and is set on not being in practice with any other doctor. He is so nice, he can’t say no to anyone as far as new patients, especially family members of existing patients.  But I can’t let his problem be my problem.

Because so many different unusual things have been happening in my body for so long, I have  had a handful of doctors (specialists I was referred to) treat my concerns dismissively. Since these clusters of symptoms seem to come and go, it is often resolved or diminished by the time I see whatever specialist my primary doctor sent me to. First they thought it might be something like Lupus. Enough slight abnormalities in my tests and labs were present, that they  thought it might be something just now starting to develop and worth monitoring for a while. So I had Rheumatology visits every six months for a few years. I was left confused as to why I was still needing to see the rheumatologist when there was not anything new going on, no new labs indicating a problem, nothing other than widespread osteoarthritis, which I already knew I had.  Eventually the doctor and the Nurse Practitioner left that practice, so I just quit going. I continued to have some of the same experiences, numbness, strange sensations like stabbing pain, tingling that feels like when you come in from the snow and your hands start to thaw out.  I don’t want to enumerate all the various things that have given me concern, but after a while I had just resigned myself to maybe just having a weird body to go with my strange mind.

My sleep specialist has some new concerns that are completely apart from my obstructive sleep apnea, I had begun having central apnea. The difference is that obstructive apnea happens when the muscles relax in sleep, and jaw goes slack, throat tissue can collapse the airway and cause you to not breathe normally.  Central sleep apnea is more serious and in my case, it .also puts some of my other health issues into a different light.  Central apnea is when the brain or the spinal column has some kind of damage and signals are not reaching the diaphragm, lungs, and abdominal muscles to tell them to do what they are supposed to do. Most of the time it is a short bit of time, then the autonomic nervous system figures it out and signals get where they need to and breathing starts up again, multiple times through the night, and that makes for sleep that is not restful or restorative. If someone who has the obstructive kind of apnea, gets to a point he is needing high pressures, those high pressures can induce the central kind of apnea, however, if the central events go away with a lowering back down of the pressures, the central apnea resolves on it’s own. Mine did not. So that meant  pressures were not the cause, and now we need to find out what IS the cause. I eventually came to realize that my doctors before, that ended up shutting down the practice, had not been really doing the job. They had been negligent, and that is why it seemed like all of the sudden this new group was finding new concerns. Looking back to the last few visits with the old practice, I saw the pattern of decline of care and professionalism. Who knows what might have happened if the new group had not been doing the job the right way. Central apnea is quite a bit more serious that Obstructive sleep apnea. Obstructive sleep apnea can kill you, but usually that only happens over time and only if left untreated. Obviously a person can easily die from Central Apnea if the system doesn’t kick back in and there is no breath for an extended amount of time. Both kinds contribute to cardiac disease, and increase the risk of many other conditions.

What finally convinced me tor certain that my new sleep doctors were trustworthy, was that I experienced that central apnea in a way that was pretty scary. I also have narcolepsy, which requires that I take a pretty potent medication at night, and it can be incapacitating for a certain amount of the time it is on board. My husband shook me and shouted to wake me up one night, and when it finally got through the fog and I was semi-conscious he told me I was flailing in my sleep, like I was fighting someone. This all happened in a much shorter time than it will take me to tell it, but as I begin to register wakefulness, I ripped my cpap mask off and immediately took a huge gulp of air like someone who just got pulled at the last minute out of a lake they almost drowned in. And another gulp, and another one, and it went on for an hour. I wasn’t breathing that way on purpose, that is just how hypoxic I was when he finally woke me up, and I couldn’t control the breathing to regulate it to a more normal breathing. The flailing, I later realized, is something I do out of a momentary claustrophobia-like panic I sometimes experience in my sleep when the mask is on and the high pressure air is whooshing down my airway at the same time I need to swallow. It lasts a few seconds, and the flailing is a response to that panicky feeling that I get because it feels like suffocation. I also had that surgery several years back to take out my tonsils and part of the palate, and other airway impediments in my nose, that was supposed to help with the obstructive apnea but didn’t. So my airway is more open back there than normal, and it’s not just a matter of moving my tongue when saliva or post nasal drip needs to be stopped from going down my windpipe. That adds to that panicky feeling because my swallow reflex fights my breathing reflex. I’d be alright if I could just make all my parts cooperate with each other!

Anyway, that gulping of air went on for nearly an hour, before I guess my oxygen saturations had finally stabilized. I ordered a pulse-oxymeter the next day. If it ever happens that bad again, I want to know what my oxygen level is. If the BiPap that started on March 8th is not going to be able to control the central apnea episodes, I will have to go to yet another measure that is not a full blown respirator, but works in a similar way, by monitoring my breathing patterns and using an algorithm, it makes adjustments to the pressures in real time on a continuous basis through the night. I don’t know what can be done beyond that, other than a gadget similar to a pacemaker that stimulates the muscles by electrical impulse. Surgery is involved in that.

Sudden loss of leg strength, difficulties with balance, dizziness, and a ratchetted gait, internal vibration-sensations, bad tinnitus,  digestion issues, all CNS-related symptoms. I always try not to think the worst. It doesn’t help anything, but this is kinda scary stuff, and the fact that certain clusters of symptoms come and go, put this former nurse in a position where I know what type of conditions CAN cause that sort of thing, and none of those are good. Since I already had some evaluation and testing of the inflammatory autoimmune stuff, I went first to my new rheumatologist to have those labs repeated, so I could maybe rule out further evaluation in that direction. All those were completely normal. Sed Rate, EBV, ANA titers all the things that point toward an inflammatory state in progress.

These are all conditions that often go undiagnosed for years because they can manifest such a wide range of symptoms from one patient to the next, and several conditions have features in common. You usually have some other thing diagnosed first (such as narcolepsy or IBS or Crohns) which later on you learn was actually caused by some over-arching condition like Lupus, MS, or it could be a tumor on the brain or spinal column.  A person can have a condition and it not show on labs, and you can also get positives on some labs and it still not establish the diagnosis, or even which condition you are dealing with.

I spoke quite a bit about that stuff early on when I first started the blog, but that was a decade ago and many current readers may not know that history. I don’t know about everybody, but I don’t like to keep talking about that stuff for long. It’s good to have some folks who are aware, and that you can vent to knowing you won’t be judged, but there are some people who you will later regret having spoken to about it at all.

I just ask you to pray for me, for the appointment tomorrow, that it will not be rushed, and that I can come away with some reassurances and not more frustrations and unanswered questions.  As I said, I have had doctors be dismissive, even make light of my concerns, and anytime I need to bring something new up with my doctor, or any doctor, and try to provide history related to it, it sort of feels like PTSD. There is a lot of history that needs to be provided, and lots of questions the doctor will probably ask. My memory is not great under the best of circumstances, but stress makes it even worse. My blood pressure shoots up every time I go to the doctor anyway, but that is part of all the CNS stuff too, BP is autonomic. My BP’s swing in wide arcs. Some are really low, some really high, no discernable rhyme or reason or pattern. My Central Nervous System just seems to be haywire. I startle with the slightest sudden move or sound around me. Not fear, just over-active reflex responses. I am having spasms, and when something jerks, the rest of my body jumps in reaction to it. I was plugging in my curling iron, and my husband poked his head around the doorway and spoke, and I jumped out of my skin and screamed. That happens a lot, and being as hard of hearing as I am, doesn’t help, even with hearing aids, I often do not hear anyone approach, especially when I am not expecting it. Then it took thirty minutes for the “fight or flight” reaction to dissipate, and my heart rate to slow down. I have a constant tremor now that started a couple of years ago, and it gets worse when I am flustered like that. It was in just my hands for a while, but now my neck too. It is only when I am moving, not at rest, which I hope essentially rules out Parkinsons? But am not sure.

When the neuro symptoms first happened several years back, I had an MRI and some nerve conduction tests. The Neurologist told me, because I specifically asked, that we weren’t dealing with ALS. ( What Steven Hawking had). It doesn’t pay to do too much  “research” at a time like this. My physical was supposed to have been two weeks ago, and her office staff called me and pushed it back, so there has already been a frustrating, though unavoidable delay in getting to discuss all this with my doctor.

She  wasn’t my doctor back when the other episode happened that lasted about 2 and a half years. It was acute at first, then had waned by the time my actual appointment with the rheumatologist came around, but clusters of those same set of symptoms recurred about once every month, with less severity. As far as I am concerned, whatever I have, I have had as far back as 2011, and possibly as far back as 1996. Narcolepsy itself is autoimmune. I have no explanation for the necrosis and collapse of my left hip’s femoral head, either, which normally doesn’t happen unless there is a trauma to the hip, which I never had. However, my doctor did treat me with oral prednisone, and prednisone injections in the period when I was first having pain there. He didn’t order an Xray. Come to find out, the only thing other than trauma that can lead to a femoral collapse, is use of prednisone and other steroids, so that actually probably made it worse.

I wrote up as brief of a history for my current doc as I could, and described the newest concerns that I am having now, and dropped it off for her today so she will have some idea about what is going on when I come in for my annual physical tomorrow. I am hoping that will make the whole ordeal a little less stressful. My husband is always willing to go with me, but this doc’s exam rooms are tiny, and he has taken a lot of time off the past couple of months for various things, and I got the impression it would be better if he didn’t have to take off again just yet. He has a very calming effect just by being there, when he can go.

I so dread having to address medical history yet again with different doctors. They all treat you in slices now. If you go to a heart doctor, he is only going to consider things that fall within that purview. They don’t look at things like, the hearing loss, and how that effects communication and my ability to give them an accurate history, because I heard wrong, or didn’t hear all of a question. Sleep docs understand how very hard it is to lose weight with sleep disorders, but family docs don’t consider that. I have recently lost a lot of weight, whereas it has been nearly impossible for years.  Few medical professionals I have ever met personally seem to really know anything about narcolepsy, and some never even heard of cataplexy. (Though ironically I do have a rather uninformed  in-law who thinks she knows what narcolepsy is, “because her cousin has it”)  You get that kind of thing. There are disabilities that are obvious and specifically consist of one condition. But there are also a lot of people who have multiple conditions that together drastically effect a person’s functional abilities. I have not spoken here about all of the ones I have.  It hurts being judged, but if I don’t advocate for myself, keep pressing for answers, I can’t get the help I need. We need to figure out what is effecting my central nervous system before more damage is done. God knows the truth, and that’s what matters. But you can see how it’s always risky to open up about any new thing regardless of the context or person you are confiding it to.

I am really looking forward to that new body in heaven! Ready to go home!!!

From the heart

I know we are getting down to the wire, and as developments took a big leap last week, that pattern may be here to stay until the end.

I haven’t talked about my medical stuff in a long time. It’s one thing when you have a bit of a barrier, communicating for the sake of maybe helping someone dealing with similar challenges, but not face to face. Most people aren’t going to probe, they may ask general questions in an effort to learn about the conditions, but they aren’t likely to get personal. I have always found it beneficial to read and hear someone else’s story, and I feel it is a generosity when someone opens up about their experiences. That is so much more informative than doctorspeak. I figure there are others who learn better that way, same as me. But sometimes, in an attempt to give some support to others, you know, casting your bread upon the waters, to see what God does with it, there are people who will use such information to hurt you. Didn’t see that coming.

My story is my story. Whether it is sad or hard or happy. I know what I have been through, and God knows how it felt.

People can also cause pain without knowing it. People who are wide open about everything, might assume everybody is like them. I have met enough people, and conversed with people of all walks of life, to understand that the way various people view things, and the way different individuals perceive things not only can be vastly different, I would go so far as saying the array of how any  one person functions is not at all like any other person. Like your fingerprints and DNA. God makes us each so unique.

I have people I can talk to about everything and anything, but I think almost everybody has someone they can’t tell things, as well. If you don’t know that, you are in for some hurt.

I used to need to talk. A lot. Before I needed to talk, I actually enjoyed talking to people. You have to be careful about who you talk to when you need to talk. There will be some who may think just because you shared it with them, they are free to talk about it, with you and even with other people. There are people who would never repeat something but they still assume that if you shared something, it is fine for them to talk about it with you, bring it up any time they speak to you. The same goes with prayer requests. It may take a lot of courage to ask someone to pray about some things. That still doesn’t constitute an invitation to bring it back up.one man’s curiosity is another man’s prying. Be careful with responding to an email from someone with a bad memory, too. I once had someone divulge something about themselves to me, that they regret terribly and I responded  to that exact email, with the principle that when it comes to things we regret, we gotta get over ourselves. Jesus died to take that guilt off our record, how dare we believe we should beat our own self up over it AFTER he bought our freedom from that yoke of guilt? Unfortunately, somehow she did not realize that my email was a direct response to hers in which she shared it, and she was highly offended that I “brought it back up”.  That wasn’t the first time a misunderstanding happened. Electronic communication is definitely not ideal. My mistake was in trying to clear it up. The Bible tells us if we let something like that pass, He will defend clear our name publicly. But most times we don’t give Him the opportunity.

My opinion these days is that  talking is overrated!

Problem-Solvers will make suggestions, whether you want them or not, when all you want is to vent. Easygoing people will sometimes say something meant to cheer you up, and that could make some folks feel, having divulged something painful, the easier-going person is being dismissive or flippant. They probably aren’t, they may relate, but are sicially clumsy.

Misunderstandings are rampant. True communication is dying.

Then there are people who are extremely empathetic, and probably to a certain point, that can be affirming, because sometimes you just want to feel understood. But there is such a thing as being empathetic to a degree that crosses a line. If you emote over a struggle someone has told you they are dealing with, and you are more sad/angry/appalled/indignant/fearful on their behalf than  they even are, that crosses a line that makes it about you instead of about their struggle, or their need of affirmation or support, or advice and therefore may offend the person who did the confiding. It may seem counter-intuitive, but the result of it is that the person whose struggle it is, may feel like you are taking a liberty that they don’t even permit themselves to have. If you are the kind of person who refuses to feel sorry for yourself, works at not complaining, staying positive, reminds yourself your burdens are lighter than that of many others, and if  the person whom you open up to is less oriented to the greater world outside their experiences, it may feel selfish to you, because your struggle is not “theirs” to emote over.  (Would that be called emotional appropriation?)

We all judge motives, moods, attitudes and meanings, reactions, even facial expressions and tone using our own typical motives, moods, attitudes and meanings, reactions, expressions and tones under the same or similar circumstances as our measuring stick.

That may be almost inevitable to a degree, but it is a good thing to always keep in mind that even two people from the same family, have totally different life experiences, and totally different temperaments, and those experiences and temperaments are a  huge influence on our own perceptions.

In a society and age of the internet, interpersonal interaction has changed a lot, in a short amount of time. Communication between two 80-year olds was always different from that of communication between two thirty-somethings, but in this present juncture of human history, the technological leap that happened during that 50 year age difference is so exponential that it is a wonder a 30-something and an 80-something don’t require a 55 year old to translate. In fact, it would probably need to be a a 47 year old and a 66 year old, because one 55 year old wouldn’t be familiar enough with ether extreme of the age range, to sufficiently translate.

We have language barriers between nations, but someone invented an app that lets you speak your language into your device, and the app translates it so the other party hears it in their own native language! Is there an age barrier language gap app yet? Somebody better get on it!

You might be a senior citizen if…. you can have an entire conversation about ailments and generation gaps.

I never wanted to get old. Maybe that stems from having been an RN. An RN whose first several years in nursing was hospice.

Did you know there are states in America where euthanasia is legal?CA, CO, HI, ME, NJ, OR, VT, WA, also DC. Montana allows it but only by court order, and they otherwise have no protocol regarding who may request it. The problem with that is, who petitions the court? So far, of the cases I have read about in Europe at least, it has mostly been the hospital who wants to use that bed for a patient who can get well, and go on to “contribute to society”. They will deny the parents wishes, and even in cases where there are available options for care elsewhere,  judges have refused to allow that child to be removed from the hospital to get that care. Judges, they expect you to address them with “your honor”, but few are honorable anymore.

Take note, America.Medical care will be like that here soon at this rate. When the government is both footing the bill and deciding who gets to die, it tends to fall in the favor of the state, not the individual. Thus far in America, other than in Montana, the decision is between the patient and doctor, but the patient must request it at least 3 times, once in writing, and requests must be a certain number of days apart. Generally 15 or 20.

Having been a cancer nurse, tends to give you an up close and personal perspective. I believe God gives life and He is the rightful one to decide when it is to end. However, when you are either the suffering patient, or the family member, and yes, even the medical worker, witnessing the suffering day after day, it’s a little easier to see how that becomes the dying person’s option of choice if available. That’s the problem. It is available and the “safeguards” tend to be weak, the language in the protocols (purposely?) vague. The truth is, A doctor can order a dosage range on the I.V. pain med (usually morphine at end stage of cancer and other conditions, to just the “right”  level to depress respiration enough,to produce a hypoxic state that will speed the process of already-fading organs and systems. Just like abortion, before it was legal, it was already happening. Isn’t that how it always works? Think of anything that became legalized in recent memory. The rational goes, conveniently, “everybody does it, we may as well make it legal” — so they can tax it!

If God gave us free will about our eternal life, it seems He would be even more apt to give us the free will option with this temporal life. Of course, He does give us free will, otherwise we would be incapable of taking our own life. Permitting is not condoning.  Homicide is homicide, regardless who is the killer. What I can’t figure out is how homicide is illegal in all 50 states, and yet physician assisted suicide is legal in some?  Lawyers. Judges. Legislatures. Sinful flesh, free will. Where unregenerate man is free to sin, he will sin.

In this world of “my truth/your truth” I guess that makes sense to the depraved mind. To quote the infamous Jerry Nadler, “God’s will is no concern” to (someone whose religios worldview is secular humanism). All of the catastrophic weather events, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, these are warnings! A demonstration, a reminder that this world, and judgment, and vengeance belong to God. If you disagree, I have to warn you, reconsider. Change your thinking on this. Admit to yourself you stand guilty before His holiness. Put your faith in the death of Christ, a pure spotless sacrifice, his burial and resurrection, call upon the name of Jesus for the salvation He is offering because the offer will not remain open much longer. He would love for you to avoid the horrors that are about to begin on earth. He takes no joy in seeing you suffer the consequences for sins He has already paid for. But immutable spiritual law requires perfect justice, and God never changes. Unlike human law, God’s law is perfect. Submit now under His Grace, or submit when it is too late. You’re going to submit anyway, every knee will bow, every tongue will confess. Why not humble yourself and submit now willingly, take the salvation Jesus bought for you so you would not have to spend eternity in the misery of hell. Once He takes His own from here, it will be too late and you will regret your foolish pride immediately, but it will be too late, if you are reading these words now, and you decline the offer of redemption being extended to you in them.

Not enough sugar in the world

When I was a nurse, I was surprised the first time a patient took their little cup full of pills, and threw them all into their mouth at once, and washed them all down with big gulps of water. Noting my surprise, he chuckled and said “easier to get it all over with at once”.

Most everyone is familiar with the line from a song in “The Sound of Music” that says “Just a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down” My posts which consist mainly of several headlines are my blogging version of those two med-taking tricks. My hat is off to those who have been sounding the alarm for more years than my 11+. It’s tricky keeping things in proportion, and the luxury of blissful ignorance is not an option.

It is hard to fathom this point where our world is at right now. As I watched some of the protest/rally/prayer meeting in D.C. yesterday evening, and noticed outside my window that darkness was falling (I’m in the same time zove), I thought, “oh no! get out of there, people, before dark. That’s when they come out!” They only come out under the cover of darkness! Sure enough, some of the first headlines I saw, were the antifa bunch.


Antifa stab 4 at rally

23 Arrested in Protester, counter protester clash in DC

The news hasn’t failed to report all of “Biden’s” cabinet picks. I dread them so much, I try not to even read or hear them. This administration is going to be everything Obama wanted his to be. If the Dems steal Georgia’s runoffs, conservatives will have no power, no real representation ever again. The demons in these people utterly despise anything good. They will do their best to quash it, punish it, whatever it takes.

Biden eyes Cuomo for Attorney General

Because that’s worked out so well for NYC, so yeah, sounds great!! Churches will definitely be in the crosshairs if that happens.

A bit of good news, and somewhat surprising:

Lyn Wood Georgia case place on the docket at Supreme Court

There was a lot of misunderstanding on the TX case and why it was rejected. They ruled that it was dismissed on standing, which is different from dismissal on merit.

Standing essentially pertains to whether the one bringing suit, has anything to lose if the case is not adjudicated. Standing asks if the plaintiff is being discouraged or prevented from exercising a legitimate constitutional right, or some cases are assigned automatic standing, such as a factory contaminating river water.

Merit has to do with the substance, the question of whether law was broken. The Supreme Court was not saying there was no breaking of the law. They were judging that Texas was too far removed from any direct damages inflicted by the other 4 states. So, Lyn Wood’s case (v Atty Gen Rathisberger) now will be reviewed, and if the technical specifications meet the appropriate qualifications, they should opt to take it up for full hearing. Ideally doing so today (Sunday, 13th) because on Monday the electors are to be certified. If they certify fraudulent election results, though, that will not be valid. I think this distinction of cases, standing, etc is why Wood and Sidney Powell split off from the Trump team. Two-or three-pronged approach provides a better shot of getting something taken up and adjudicated at the Supreme Court level. That is also why all of the dismissals at lower courts were not setbacks. They are just a necessary part of the path to the Supreme Court. (Lawyering must take an awful lot of patience!) The lawyers expected those, and many of them were not even initiated by the Trump campaign. I’m not saying the Justices won’t dismiss Wood’s case. In this “good is bad and up is down” climate, we may as well accept that the thing that makes sense will almost certainly NOT be the thing happen!

It won’t truly be over until someone is sworn in on Jan 20. Even then, with the Hunter Biden scandal, who knows? This faux outrage that Bill Barr knew about the Hunter investigations for 3 months, is a crock. I and anyone who watches alternative news sources, knew about it 3 mo. ago, and the Dems knew even back when his crimes were taking place, because most of them also have sweet behind-scenes deals with China as well. Fientein’s sudden memory struggles are awfully convenient! She employed a Chinese driver for years, and she and her husband have large holdings and business interests going with China, themselves.

The evil, the cheating, lying, extorting, thievery, sedition, personal gain, perversion, and corruption that surround our governmental representatives (not “leaders”) is a bitter, gag-inducing pill for Christian people to swallow. Whole sugar plantations couldn’t make it palatable, but like dogs returning to their own vomit, these who sold their soul for earthly, temporary gain, can never get enough!

As for me, I am just very gratefully looking up, and listening for trumpets!