After my mom passed a few weeks back, it has taken some time for things to settle back into life as before, and then our daughter-in-law was deployed to Australia for 6-8 weeks, so I’ve been taking care of our toddler grandson as he stays with us (24/7) 5 days each week.

In between I had time to start online classes through Koinonia Institute. It’s self-paced, so flexible enough to work around the grandbaby days.

It is getting harder all the time to keep immersed in the prophecy-related news, not just because of other demands on my time, nor how rapidly things are converging, but because of how bad things are getting and the mental toll it can take, the energy it can drain.

So many of the out-front folks in the watchman community are now cautioning people to expect hardship and a possibly longer wait than most had hoped, which frankly has been disheartening. It stands to reason that the closer we are to the time of Jacob’s trouble, the more alarming the conditions will be by virtue of the proximity, but that doesn’t necessarily have to mean we are going to endure catastrophe.

Have you ever been a hair’s breadth from being part of a massive pile-up on the interstate, but narrowly escaped? Being that close in proximity, sure it’s much more alarming than the perspective of the fellow traveling the other direction on the other side of the barrier who was literally as close, yet completely out of harms way. Ignorance is bliss.

Had the driver who narrowly escaped the pile-up, been more obedient to the safety rules, he likely would not have been following so closely behind the vehicle he barely missed crashing into.

I often read or hear; “what did you expect the end times were going to look like?” It’s purposely ironic because we nearly all admit we never expected to see as much if the stage-setting as we have witnessed.

It’s kind of like being behind bulletproof glass. We can see everything, but remain, for the most part, unaffected by it. Prior to the things that have happened in this world since 2020, I could rightfully say I had been through some pretty tough things in my life. But the scale or maybe even the definition of “trials” is different post 2020. Wouldn’t you agree?  Maybe that’s only from a western world perspective, but that’s the perspective relevent to the time and place God deemed I would have. I didn’t choose it, and I am not ignorant of the difference between conditions here vs that of the citizens of China, North Korea, Ethiopia or Sudan.

God doesn’t owe us the blessings we have, and as much as I have enjoyed them, I don’t “deserve” them. I didn’t earn them. I am guilty of taking them for granted. It’s the nature of our flesh. Only the light provided by the Holy Spirit allows me to comprehend the spiritual paradigm that exists. All good things come from His hand. I am content with what is, and I pray I will be content even if I someday have less.

After what, 12 years (?) of this blog, and 14 years as a called “watchwoman”, I still struggle with the flesh growing weary and weak, and to discipline myself in spiritual “diet and exercise”. I don’t think it’s supposed to get any easier. If it got easier, there would be no growth taking place. Is an apple tree aware of the apples it produces? Granted we are not so passive as a tree or vine, but with regard to our spiritual fruit-bearing, in some ways we are. I am the vine and ye are the branches. He that abideth in me, and I in him, shall bear much fruit, for without me, ye can do nothing. The difference between us and a vine or tree, is volition. We have a will, and that will has to submit to the will of our Father. He does the work of our spiritual growth and fruit. His will is laid out in His Word. I just keep coming back to that. It’s all I know to do. Talk to Him and “hear” His Word. The Word produces faith, the Spirit grants understanding. Everything that I make into a matter of prayer, He will bring into line with His plan.

I have my moments, usually very brief, but still, when I start to feel discouraged. How can I not, when evil seems to have the upper hand in so many arenas. But that is why “spiritual and mental hygiene” are most critical. Balance the intake. Setting aside the world news and spending more time in God’s Book and reminding myself that obedience=safety. We are responsible for the light that we have. To the degree we strive to do the things we know God wants us to do, and the degree we abstain from things that we know we should not do, we keep ourselves under the covering of Divine protection and safety. Not forsaking the assembling together, partaking of the Word, thinking on things that are pure and good.

I am not a television watcher, and most youtube or other video I watch is sermons or other Christian material not “entertainment”. But every so often I will just read a novel or watch a funny video. And sometimes I partake if more of it than I really ought to, because it’s easy and sometines I just want to be lazy.  I look at these sort of like the empty calories in a diet. It’s junk food. Even “classic literature” or something “informative” though not “bad” per se, can still be a waste of time if not kept in moderation. I want to be better at investing my minutes in things that have some eternal value.

I have spent a lot of years complicating things that are simple. Trying this, trying that. At the end of the day, and at the end of a life, all that counts for eternity is whatever I submit to Him. I’m really tired of trying to be in charge, and of trying with my weary aging little brain to make sense if it all. He’s proven faithful. He began the work, He will complete it. Why not just entrust it all to Him? I’ll be happy if I can manage to just keep “self” out of the way. Maybe it’s a bit of wisdom gleaned as I age. I’ve never been fast or strong, but now don’t even have the stamina and determination I once had. Maybe it’s the fact I am only 20 years younger than my Mom was, and my goodness, how brief is 20 years when you’ve raised a couple of kids and it feels like you brought them home from the hospital just a week or so ago. Perception of time changes the longer you’ve been around. No wonder a day is as a thousand years to an eternal God, huh?

It’s all about perspective. When I figured that out about 13 years ago, it changed everything. When you can’t do one single solitary thing about a situation, it’s still within your power to adjust your perspective. I’m not talking about any “power of positive thinking” here, just the freedom that comes with knowing and facing (and accepting) truth! Truth isn’t so hard to find, it’s just we don’t like a lot of it!  That’s why pride month. It’s why cults exist. People know there’s a God, they just don’t like the idea of accounting to Him, and loving not the truth, God gave them over to their desires, and to the deceptions their itching ears prefer.

The older I get, the more appealing “simple” is.

No matter how much longer the wait is for our blessed hope, the wait gets shorter every day. Pretty simple, yes? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯