A Personal Appeal

I haven’t really written much on a personal level for a long time on here, for a handful of reasons. One is that the deep desire to connect with other folks who long for the blessed hope, can lead to online friendship with real people who come with their own wounds, which the prince of the power of the air has so much leeway for interfering and wreaking havoc with. Have you noticed that with electronic communication like texts, emails and instant messaging? Communicating long distance with people who know you in person, is one thing. They know your mannerisms and your speech patterns, your sense of humor, when you’re being facetious, for the most part and will usually perceive your meaning pretty close to your intended meaning. Even those who know you can get a little paranoid and inject or project a tone you weren’t going for. So when you make a “cyber friend” and  get acquainted online, you can share a lots of facts but that context of personality, the things you learn about a person’s heart and ways of relating, is all missing, and the potential for misunderstanding and misinterpretation is much greater.

Such a scenario took place a few years ago, and the way I do friendship, I am a way too  loyal and invested sort of friend, and way too conscientious to handle a conflict erupting from a gross misunderstanding when it can’t get resolved. (I am still friends with my first grade bestie from 52 years ago!) I had to break off communication with the cyber friend after many shared emails, letters, etc, because she would not believe me when I explained what she had misinterpreted. I wasn’t going to give the devil a foothold. She ” heard” something I didn’t say accusing me of ” bringing back up and throwing in her face” something she shared, when in fact, my response was a direct response to the email in which she had shared it.  Obviously it was a deep, unhealed wound she already had, and the misinterpretation the way she “translated” it, hurt her. I apologized, but wanted her to know my actual meaning, but she was too far up the pain scale to hear. She told me she was not going to have further interaction, so I tried calling. Some things can’t be fixed by human beings. I had gotten to know enough about her to recognize from my own life experiences that when you have been hit with figurative sledgehammers a lot in life, it is easy to mistake other things as just another s lo edgehammer coming at you.

So, I began to keep “arms length” in the making cyber friends arena.

That was before covid, but both this dear Christian lady and myself were coping with physical conditions that were isolating. Post Covid, a lot more folks out there now have some personal experience with isolation, and throw into the mix, many have no thriving church to attend, and people are connecting via that sphere of cyberspace more and more.

So part of my plea is this: tread cautiously in that world. Just as the enemy can and does often manipulate things like lights and appliances when manifesting in a home, the demonic realm loves even more, scrambling “signals” when words get typed, translated to ones and zeros, then translated back to words when the person on the other end reads your text, e-mail or DM. It is alllll electrical. Even as the eye reads and brain receives, it is facilitated by electrical impulses moving between synapses and neurons, and the fluids which conduct them. It’s the proverbial “devil’s playground”.

Off that and on to something I’m presently up to. I have given you guys some updates as Mom had major surgery (now 15 mo ago), and when she entered Hospice care this past fall. The trips to WV have been hard, several by train and as Mom’s medical Power of Attorney and advocate, I have been intimately involved. I have been forced to make many difficult decisions and fight some truly hellacious battles, as anyone who has ever participated in the care of an aging, ailing parent can testify. Sometimes away from home up to 3 weeks at a time, sometimes 2 weeks, but at least one week and even two trips some months. Where my health had blessedly reached ( after 20 years of struggle and fight) a much better level prior to Mom’s surgery, I have now lost a good 70% of that ground. So my second appeal is three-fold, for me to regain lost ground, (and re-lose gained weight), for continued prayers for Mom, and prayers for her (on the Autism spectrum) grandson who lives with her and tends to her day to day household affairs, meds, and provides her hands-on assistance 126 hours out of 168 hours of around the clock care every single week when I’m not there. Frankly aside from the Dear Lord Himself, Justin is the hero of this scenario. Please lift him up in prayer. He has only recently been diagnosed, and is still figuring a lot out, personally.

Finally, a 4th appeal for my small business that I have been trying to get going for the last 4 years or so. Jewelry. First I was making it, but my eyes are going, my back can’t handle the strain of hunching over a table for hours on end,  my hands are  unsteady, and my cognitive function and processing are impaired by the triple-wammy sleep disorders I have that went untreated for decades.

But I am excited because by the grace of God I have finally started having enough success that I have been able to pay half of the cost of Mom’s personal care Aid three nights a week. The other half of that comes out of her social security check, while half of her weekly 24 daytime aid hours are on a sliding scale, which also comes out of her income, then my younger brother pays the other 12 daytime aid hours at full cost because insurance doesn’t cover any of those aid hours. I thank God for the provision of the program through the local council on aging that provides the 15 hours on a sliding scale that is subsidized. We have cleared the hurdles for the state Medicaid Waver that will allow more daytime aid hours to be paid for by Medicaid, but night hours will still be out of pocket. Mom tithed on every penny God ever put in her hand. She was a good steward with not just money but everything. I knew God was going to make a way, but I won’t lie, I have sweated it several “moments” along the way. I never signed up or volunteered to make decisions about her money, home, even burial plan, but somebody had to.

My selling is on Mercari. My username on there is DoryMorninGlory. I used to do an Etsy shop called Morning Glory Blvd, and sell some on Ebay, but being I am not a tech-savy 20-30 year old, I just can’t juggle two or three selling platforms or learn yet another new app that facilitates that, so I am sticking with Mercari. They have the lowest, most straightforward fee structure.

Now I am sticking to vintage, pre-owned jewelry, inexpensive fashion pieces, with a few of my own created pieces on the rare occasion I do make something, (or ones I had previously made), and have sold almost all of my lifelong personal collection of vintage and handful of karat gold items hubby gave me over the years. Hated to, but I can’t move into Mom’s home in WV “for the duration” to be her aid full time myself, and paying for the wonderful Christian Aid God provided is what’s keeping her out of a nursing home. The waver kicks in, in March, and will cover more day hours, but after that, I’ll still need to help  pay for nights so Justn can get some sleep. Mom had a decent nest egg of savings before the surgery but medical costs and rehab swallowed it whole in the first three months.

I share this not for sympathy, but prayer. I will share a link so you can find my items (Mercari doesn’t let you set up a cyber shop per se, you just have listings), but that should let you find my other items in case you are interested. Another way you can help, and I am hesitant to ask, (but God says, you have not because ye ask not). I got the idea from an eBay seller, a senior citizen trying to make ends meet. Friends would bring her old jewelry they had sitting around never wearing anymore. “Costume stuff” or modern “fashion” jewelry in good shape, and they’d donate that to her, then she would work to sell it. With shakey hands, numb fingers, and less manual dexterity, I hardly bothered wearing mine anymore, and would be leaving it all behind anyway, so, once I I got past the sentimental attachment, I was fine. Anyhoo, I guess if the Lord were to move anyone out there reading this to help me that way, I would receive your no-longer needed baubles gratefully. Not asking for gold and silver.

I figure even in harsh economic times, women will continue to have the God given urge to find little sparklies to “prettify” with. Not everyone has the budget for the break-the-bank variety, but a little sparkle is nice too.

It’s been fulfilling for me, small-scale as it is, and slow-as-molassas that I am in my progress, to feel productive in work. Crunching numbers, negotiating prices, considering fees and costs, all a far cry from my past life as an RN, but I needed to take something I know and enjoy and had, and make it profitable somehow. My only experience other than nursing was in jewelry sales, (unless you count my very first job as a clown, and that ain’t an option) and though I don’t own a lot of ” stuff”,  materially speaking, I’ve always liked jewelry. Though I frequently give it away to friends, Mom, aunts, cousins, sisters, I still had a lot. I sold that and went through Mom’s jewelry box while I was there, (and said bestie from first grade weeded through hers). Now all I gotta do is spin all that straw into gold, er, you know, sell it!

Well, if you’re a guy reading this, you’re probably laughing. If you’re a woman, you might understand. Selling mine was tough. The battle between sentimental value vs cash in hand. Selling someone else’s is a little less daunting, but being Mom and bestie,I still consider stuff I probably shouldn’t. (How much did she pay for that. Who gave her this). When in reality cash in hand is better than neglected value sitting in a drawer or box. That’s what I tell myself when I sell for $30 what I know a trendy boutique will turn around and charge $65 for, (but hey, that’s Capitalism!)

Yeah. While I am baring my heart and the bizarre ways of my mind, the excitement of actually getting somewhere with this, (probably a 60 hour workweek of photographing, cropping, creating listings, packaging, running to post office) and to net around $200 in sales,  well that probably seems paltry, but it’s meeting the need. This is what I mean when I say it takes me much longer than it would someone younger and who didn’t have the cognitive challenges. But it’s exciting to feel like I am contributing again. Yet my central nervous system is so wonky I also feel a little manic.

Which, by the way, is also why I don’t write so much of the personal posts or researched articles I used to write years back, well, that and Mom’s care. Many people prefer videos anyway, and I will not take up youTubing. My learning curve keeps getting steeper! All I’m tryna do is stay in the race. I put tracts and my card for the blog in each package too.

Anyway, ya’ll, I figure we are on the final laps. The wheels are gonna fall off planet Earth soon. We don’t have much longer to endure. Keep pressing into Jesus, keep doing what He has you doing. Keep praying, witnessing, trusting, and watching. Keep repenting when you fail, getting back up and back at it.

Links to check out some of what I’m selling, (several different price points) message me thru mercari and let me know you stopped by, that alone will be an encouragement!

Necklace Beautiful ocean jasper and genuine turquoise wire wrapped pendant:

Laurel Burch Painted Ladies necklace NWT Make Offer!:

Sterling silver ruby heart ring:

If you happen to have jewelry you’d like to donate, use contact form below.


2 thoughts on “A Personal Appeal

    • Oh, I didn’t think of that, lol. But thanks for trying! Yeah, I was just sitting here thinking how wearying it is that everything we first had access to on the internet, now requires the submitting of all our identifying information and increasingly longer, more complex passwords that they told us we should never write down anywhere and never use the same one for any other site. I think of Paul Harvey and his “If I were the devil” monologue. If I were the devil and wanted to make things as hard as possible for the aging brain, I’d invent a thing called the internet, require 12 character passwords to access anything, and then make the internet the only way to “see” a doctor, pay bills, sell wares, or know what’s really happening in the rest of the world. We were the last people in my circle of acquaintance to get a computer in our home around 2003. We had one and the kids weren’t allowed on it and didn’t have their own. I used my flip phone until I started getting texts that used so much code that my flip phone couldn’t even open the text. I heard someone recently say they expect there will be technology in heaven. Noooooo, surely not! Please! I feel very sad for my kids’ generation who never knew a world without “cyberspace”.

      Liked by 1 person

Play nice!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.